Chapter 70
Caleb
I blink repeatedly, praying for this to be a nightmare, but the door in front of me stays, and so does the grim look on his
face.
“Mr. Steele, you have a tumor located in your frontal lobe,” the doctor points to a shadowy mass on the MRI scan clipped to the light board. When I still look confused, he begins talking in Buglish. “I know the other doctor told you this already, but it doesn’t hurt to repeat what this means,” he clears his throat. “The frontal lobe is responsible for things like impulse control, decision–making, and personality. It is also the cause of the headaches you mentioned”
His words give me pause, and since I’ve watched way too many episodes of Grey’s Anatomy with Leah, I know what else the frontal lobe is in charge of: behavior.
A feeling of dread hugs me like a suffocating blanket. What if Leah changes her mind about getting married to me once she hears about this? Will she think the tumor is the reason for my proposal in the first place?
The doctor continues, “Your girlfriend is in the waiting room. We didn’t let her come in because we wanted to discuss your diagnosis with you first. But we can bring her in now if you would like.”
Instead of answering, I stare down at the floor. Truthfully, I dont want Leah to come in here and learn about my condition. We were on cloud nine before I fell unconscious, and now now everything is shit due to this bombshell. I don’t have fucking time to have a tumor!
A few minutes later, Leah burst into the room. “Caleb!” she exclaims. “Oh my God, are you okay? What happened? They wouldn’t tell me anything!”
My little author is by my side in an instant, gripping my hand and giving me a concerned look. I feel guilty seeing the sweet expression on her face. How do I break the news to her without ruining what we have?
“Leah…” I begin in a way voice. “The doctors found something on my brain scan. A tumor. In my frontal lobe.”
Actual fear, the kind that keeps you up at night and praying for a miracle, flashes over Leah’s face. “A tumor? Oh, Caleb…” Her voice is hoarse, and her grip on my hand tightens. “What…what does that mean? Is it…is it cancer?”
Her question makes me freeze in place.
Cancer shit, it better not be fucking cancer! I can’t have that, not when I’m about to become a father. Gosh, God or whoever is in charge of fate wouldn’t be that cruel, right?!
My thoughts make me want to scream my heart out, but I push back the urge since I don’t want to worry Leah. My father taught me never to show emotion; he said men should be men, and in his eyes, that meant being cold, and the coldness he taught me to feel is coming in handy right now,
I deadpan as I speak, “The doctors don’t know if this is cancer yet. They said something about needing to do a biopsy to determine if it’s malignant or benign.”
Leah is my complete opposite. She is not scared to let tears crawl up her eyes as she processes this information. “A biopsy?
When?”
The doctor, who has been standing quietly to the side like a shadow, finally speaks up. “We’d like to schedule the procedure as soon as possible, ideally within the next few days.”
19:04 Sat, Feb 1
Chapter 70
Leah’s face turns pale. It’s as if hearing the doctor speak amplified her fear, but when she meets my eyes, she forces a determined expression. “Okay, this is good. There is a plan, and we will get through this together, Caleb. Whatever it is that you have, we will face it as a team.”
1 smile weakly at Leah’s words, touched by her unwavering support. But there is more to this…
“Leah.” I say softly. “There’s something else you need to know.“ake a deep breath, steeling myself. “The frontal lobe controls things like decision–making and personality. The tumor it might have affected my behavior recently.”
Leah’s brow furrows in confusion. “What do you
mean?”
1 can barely meet her eyes as I continue. “I mean… our relationshop, my proposal… what if it was all because of this tumor?” For a moment, I see the same fear I feel mirrored in Leah’s beautiful eyes, but then it turns to determination. “Caleb Steele, don’t you dare. Don’t you dare try to push me away or discount what we have because of this.” Her voice is fierce, brooking no argument. “I know you. I know your heart. This tumor didn’t make you fall in love with me or want to marry me. That was all you.”
I want to believe her, but doubt still gnaws at me. “How can you be so sure?
en how you look at me. How you care for me. Leah’s expression softens. “Because I’ve How you support my dreams and make me laugh. No tumor could fake that kind of love and connection.”
I want so badly to believe Leah, to trust in the strength of our love. But the fear still lingers.
hear what you’re saying, Leah,” I say softly. “And I want to believe it. But this tumor…it complicates things. What if I’m not the same person after treatment? What if I change?”
Leah cups my face in her hands, her eyes blazing with determination. “Then we’ll face that together, too. For better or for worse, remember? Those vows we’re going to take–they’re not just pretty words. They mean something.”
I lean into her touch, drawing comfort from her presence. “You’d still want to marry me, even with all this uncertainty?”
“Of course I would,” Leah says without station. “I love you, Caleb. Besides, it’s a little too late to turn back now when we
have these little ones waiting to be born.”
She places her hand on her pregnant stomach, and I feel like a total failure of a future father. We are about to have twins- this should be the happiest time of our lives. But instead of painting rooms and celebrating with Leah, I’m sitting here with a tumor, unsure of who the hell I am.
“Leah, I’m so sorry for having a tumor,” I say, my voice cracking You shouldn’t have to deal with this kind of stress when you’re pregnant with our children.”
Leah’s eyes
flash with anger. “Don’t you dare apologize! This isn’t your fault.”
“I know, but you’re pregnant, and stress-”
“Is bad for pregnancies, I know,” Leah cuts me off. “And yes, I also know our situation isn’t ideal, but not even a tumor can chase me away. Life gives you lemons sometimes, and yes, it’s unfortunate that I’m pregnant, but where else would I be but by your side?”
I smile at how fierce she is being, but the question is: will Leah remain this confident if it turns out my tumor is the cause for everything we have built together?
