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It’s been seven days since I woke up in the hospital, with no one by my side except
the nurse.
Thinking about the fiancé who had left me behind, My eyes darkened a bit.
I grabbed my phone, which had run out of battery, borrowed a charger, and turned it on. There was no message from Ethan. Just as I was about to turn it off, I saw Ethan’s name flashing on the screen.
As soon as I answered, his accusatory voice pierced through:
“Claire, what are you trying to pull now? In that situation, Vanessa has a heart condition, what was wrong with me taking her away? We were already rescued, there was going to be a second team of rescuers. Why didn’t you just follow them
Your back? I had to leave because I had a billion dollar project at the company. job doesn’t pay much, so what are you so upset about? You haven’t answered my calls for days!”
I listened calmly as he poured out his frustrations, there wasn’t a hint of concern in his voice, only accusations, every word was talking down to me while defending Vanessa.
When he finally finished pouring, I hoarsely said, “I’m in the hospital…” But before. I could finish, he interrupted:
“Claire, can you stop using such pathetic tricks to get my attention? Always trying to–get the attention, you’re disgusting. You’re doing this because you never believed that Vanessa and I were innocent, right? Why is your mind so nasty? No wonder Vanessa always says you’re full of schemes.”
I
Then he hung up. When I called him back, found out that he had blocked me.
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I laughed at myself and found a caregiver.
I wasn’t going to neglect my health just because Ethan wasn’t worth it.
I stayed in the hospital for 20 days. During that time, Ethan didn’t call me even
once.
I had surgery to remove the steel rod from my leg. Although I might have a slight limp, my leg was saved, and for that, I was grateful.
After these things happened, I decided to start loving myself more.
20 days later, I was discharged from the hospital, but unexpectedly, I received a
call from Ethan.
When I answered, he asked, “Claire, have you reflected on what you did wrong?”
“Why should I reflect?” I replied coldly.
Ethan was taken aback by my tone, then softened his voice:
“We are the ones in a relationship. Vanessa and I have always been innocent, but you always make a fuss. That was a landslide, and she was so scared, plus she had a heart condition. I just hoped you’d be more understanding.”
The more he spoke, the more justified he sounded, perhaps even convincing
himself.
He then said, “I know I was wrong to leave you behind that day. I’ve booked a restaurant. Let me take you out to dinner?
His tone wasn’t particularly sincere, but after being with him for so many years, I knew this was his way of making amends.
But after experiencing the moment of death and leaving me at that moment by him, I no longer had any hope for Ethan.
During my hospital stay, I reflected on my past with Ethan and realized that when you invest too much in a relationship, you become afraid of losing it, and end up becoming excessively submissive.
I had spoiled Ethan too much, letting him punish me whenever he wanted, and making me suffer whenever he wished.
In the past, whenever he offered a vague reconciliation, I would immediately take the opportunity to make up with him, ignoring the real issues between us.
That’s why his friends never thought highly of me, seeing me as nothing more than a pushover.
And they were right–if I weren’t such a pushover, how could Ethan treat me with such disregard?
When he suggested dinner, I suddenly felt a sense of peace and said, “Come pick me up from the hospital.”
He seemed to freeze, probably remembering the time he accused me of using underhanded tactics to get his attention, never expecting that I was truly in the hospital.
He insisted on coming to pick me up with a gentle tone.
But I waited for a long time until it got so late. I eventually took a cab home, ate takeout, and never saw any sign of Ethan.
I packed up my things with my injured leg.
I saw that Vanessa had posted a picture of a candlelit dinner: “I knew you’d always be there when I needed you.
Looking at the seemingly romantic picture, I suddenly felt a sense of release.
In Ethan’s heart, I would never compare to Vanessa. As long as Vanessa was
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around, I would always be the one left behind.
I went from being mad every time that happened, until now, making a scene to accepting it as normal. After experiencing the moment of death, I suddenly felt it was all so meaningless.
Why should I, in the prime of my life, let a man decide my fate?
